With a hot cup of tea, snug socks and my mat - I couldn’t be more comfortable right now. Outside its raining and I’m sitting here, after this mornings Hatha practice, taking time out to collect my thoughts. Not a bad start to the day if you ask me.
Over the past few days there have been a number of people I’ve come across who manage to ooze stress and anxiety, and to be honest its challenging not to be affected by this. Being back in the real world means facing real life issues, one of which includes meeting and being around people who are stressed, possibly angry etc. This could be at the supermarkets, via phone calls whilst trying to find a space, in traffic. There isn’t the same ‘laid back’ attitude which exists in India. People are consumed by many social pressures, financial pressures etc which in essence breeds illness. My challenge - remain centered amongst this and do not allow myself to also become victim to such pressures. This isn’t to say I won’t feel stressed at times - I’m only human and that’s life I suppose, but something I need to work hard on is maintaining that ‘witness’. To be aware of how I’m feeling, constantly checking in to make sure I’m choosing my emotions rather than allowing them to choose me.
Yesterday I wanted to (in fact I did) cry. I had a momentary lapse in control where I felt completely overwhelmed by life here in Australia, specifically the ridiculous pace that people (which was once me) work/move/talk. Coming from the presence of the most centered person I’ve ever met, Bharath, it’s upsetting to see how vastly different my life/surroundings has since become. Restaurants playing loud trance music, people inhaling their food at lunch time.. it may sound silly but this sort of life has become foreign to me. Don’t get me wrong - India is the loudest place on the planet - but it’s a different sort of loud. Maybe it’s the pace of India which I miss? Or maybe it’s because I can’t understand anyone 99% of the time which means my world is ironically silent there? I’m not sure. I will meditate on that. All I know, is coming home has been/is the ultimate challenge for me. Who would have thought!!
Today is committed to more hall searching, insurance organising and finalising my website. It may all sound boring to some but for me, this is such an exciting day. Things are finally happening. Granted its slow as Im struggling to find a space, but i know it will all fall into place.
Until next time, be sure to take time out for yourself - away from the craziness of life. Sit quietly in a room, breathe and collect your thoughts. Your body and mind will thank you for it.