Fear has stopped me from doing so many things in my life. So many. And I am so tired of worry about things to happen which are not likely to ever happen. I’ve been introduced to a man who has such a clear and beautiful view of life - Sudhguru. He talks about fear - that it is not a real thing. Fear is only in the mind. And he asks people to question why it is that they allow the only part of life which they can control, their mind, to be filled with horror stories rather than comedies. There are enough horror stories out there, and no doubt we will be exposed to many of them, but we can at least control the workings of our mind. The mind does not have to hold within it horror stories. This is how I choose to live from now on. A conscious awareness of choosing better for myself.
At the moment, I am subjecting myself to a life I do not enjoy - working in the corporate world is not for me. I have tried for over 8 years to trick myself into believing it is. But its not - never has been and never will be.
In a family of academics - lawyers, teachers etc etc - I was always encouraged to walk the same paths. But you just cant squish a square peg into a round hole. You just cant - at least not without destroying the peg in the process. This is where I’m at. A position in my life where I can’t keep pushing anymore - trying to be / become someone I’m not.
So its decided - I’m off to India in a matter of weeks to study the art of yoga intensely. 13 hour days for 2.5 months. I have practiced for over 4 years now and my passion grows stronger each day.
I’m so nervous about these huge life choices i am making, (I’m also moving to Melbourne when i get home), but at the same time I have never felt so free.
In 3 weeks from now I will be putting in my notice. And moving from a $100k job, with $1.5 million in property debt, to unemployment. I can’t wait.
My intentions are of course to return to Australia and open my own studio. One which draws a crowd of people who love and respect the beauty that is yoga.
But for now, i will continue to practice daily and learn all I can about starting my own yoga business so I can share my teachings with those who choose to learn.
Hello new life. I have been waiting for you for a long time. I’m on my way xxx