Bendy or broken... i'm not sure?

Where to begin. What a day I’ve had. Right now I’m sitting on my bed, trying to keep my eyes open after just finishing training, not even an hour ago. It’s 9.00pm as I write this and training began at 5.00am. I am bruised, my legs are still shaking, my eyes are stinging and my back is killing me. One can’t help but wonder why people put themselves through this torture - I mean training. I like to think I know why but then there are moments where i stop and ask myself, “what the hell are you doing Jessica?!” But when those moments of doubt pass, I recall why I am here and manage to solider on. Tonight I almost got my legs behind my head so that’s progress! I’m just scared they will get stuck when i eventually do get them there.

Tonight i was so tired coming home I ate stale bread for dinner (couldn’t be bothered going out) and had a cold shower (didn’t want to wait the 15 minutes for the shower to heat up). And the day doesn’t end there - I have to continue to study the asanas in preparation for teaching tomorrow. Tonight’s asanas are Utkatasana, Garudasana, and Utthita Hasta Padangustasana. I can barely see the pages of the book let alone study them! Hmmm…

So back to my original comment of “what a day I’ve had”. To try and bring some sort of order to my writing, as no doubt its already all over the place, I shall use headings. Far simpler style for the exhausted nutcase who is writing the post. It begins with, teacher training.


I spent many hours yesterday and last night preparing to teach my first class today. The postures to teach were Tadasana, Parvtasana, Padagushtasana, Vrksasana. (Forgive the highly likely incorrect spelling. My text book is all of 1.5 metres away and its far to far to reach right not to confirm).

I put a lot of effort into learning all the ‘stages’ of teaching, as well as the opening and closing chants (in Sanskrit) I would need to lead the group through. Considering I am here to challenge myself, and wanted to overcome the anxiety of teaching, i put my hand up to be the teacher today. Our main room was divided by curtains into four parts so each teacher could teach their group. I had 5 other people in my group. Considering everyone was still in the same room attempting to teach, it got a little loud and distracting, but eventually I found my feet, and concentration, and was able to carry on with my teaching somewhat uninterrupted. I was so terribly nervous at the beginning. Internally my heart was racing but apparently I didn’t appear nervous at all. Excellent! The group noticed I was far more confident at the end compared with the beginning only because I got a little louder. That was my biggest criticism of the entire practice. Of course there were minor technical steps I missed, but overall everyone said they really enjoyed the experience, that I was well prepared and guided them well. The group said I appear very natural and calm. And the best bit - get this - I was told I have an angelic voice and would be a wonderful practitioner during relaxation classes!!! I couldn’t help but laugh when they said this. I said “my partner and family may have a slightly different opinion…”   ;-)

So, all in all, I threw myself in the deep end and feel so much calmer for having done so. Excellent start.


Our anatomy teacher, who is a doctor here in Mysore and completes a lot of social work in tea plantations, reminds me of an Indian Ken (my step dad). I can’t help but giggle when I see and listen to him because his mannerisms remind me so much of Ken - in a very good way of course. I can’t even pinpoint exactly what it is, but it’s there. So Ken, if you’re reading - I have found your Indian twin!


I had my first coconut today. On 9th main, which is a busy street here in Gokulam, a weathered and very thin old man which grey hair and leathery skin stands at his coconut stall all day selling to mostly the westerners who walk by. He is famous for having the best coconuts in the area. Behind the hut which houses a trailer of coconuts splayed all over the ground, tends to be cows who eat the rotten coconuts. Interesting world.

So, on my way home from lunch at Depth n Green (they are getting to know me there) I decided to stop in and try one these famous coconuts. I had the option of jelly or water. Jelly is sweet, water is not. I asked for a recommendation and before agreeing to the recommended jelly coconut, the machete was already out and the top of the coconut skillfully hacked off. My coconut was full of water too so I wasn’t sure what the difference was, until I touched the inside. It really was like putting my fingers into jelly!

Ok - enough on coconuts.


Something I really struggle with here is the number of stray dogs walking around the place - or lying in the dirt under a tree trying to cool down. These dogs look so unwell - the fur looks/is flea bitten, they are anorexic and they seem to really struggle when they go to the toilet (whenever ive walked past and noticed this. Im not seeking this out). At night I also hear the dogs screeching, like they are being beaten or harmed in some way. I’m not sure what is going on, nor am I game to find out, but it’s quite awful to hear. I’m so glad we do it differently back home. Our animals are loved - it’s what they deserve and need - whereas here there is no regard for animals, especially dogs. 

But on a cheerier note - everyone LOVES my pug shawl from Tara-Ellen. Here all the westerners are trying to look hippee or Indian and then I come along with my wrap also but it’s covered in pugs. Hahaha! Love it.

Well - that’s all from me for now. I have all of a couple of hours sleep before I do it ALL again!

Namaste xx