I was asked a question via Instagram about how I stay so positive all the time. I sat and pondered this question for some time before replying.
I firstly thought to myself - wow, how awesome is it that the world sees me as a positive person. I know there have been times in my life where I would never have been considered a positive person, so there has certainly been some sort of fundamental shift over the years.
Upon reflection, I then agreed that I am a positive person. I do my very best to remain positive regardless of uncomfortable, dire and what can feel like hopeless situations which still appear in my life. So why is that? What have I tapped into that perhaps others have difficulty finding?
My immediate thought was “Gratitude”. I know gratitude has been key to feeling happy in life - for appreciating both the good and the bad - however the answer is deeper than just gratitude alone. So what was it?
My reply. Decisiveness.
Let me explain. Life is made up of a collection of choices. We can choose the career path we head down. We can choose the relationships we cultivate and those we let go. We can choose what food to put into our bodies. We can choose how we feel in any given moment, happy or sad.
For me, a positive and happy life has stemmed from being decisive. I’m choosing my path. I’m choosing every single step I make and I accept the consequences of those steps. I do not put blame onto others if things don’t turn out as I’d planned. Rather, I accept wholeheartedly and willingly that my life is mine and I am solely responsible for it.
Over the years (mostly pre-yoga career) I’ve worked with clients who were quite happy to blame the rest of the world for why things were not working out as they had hoped. It was rare to come across a client who actually took a step back to acknowledge their part in their life, their injury or illness, and take responsibility for the next steps to move forward. They waited for, and allowed, other people to make decisions for them. And let’s just say the decisions made were rarely what the client would have chosen had it been up to them. But they played the victim game and then this gave them another excuse to blame the world for their lives not turning out as they wanted. And so the cycle continues. This makes for a very negative, unhappy existence.
Just over three years ago Owen and I made a decision to pack up and leave Adelaide, moving to Melbourne. It hasn’t been an easy road. Let me assure you of that. In fact, coming here has been the toughest years of my life. But they have been the happiest too. Why? Because I’m following a path chosen by me. I make decisions about how I want to live my life and I go after that. It doesn’t always work. Sure. And I’ve been knocked back time and time again. But I choose to look at every knock back, every medical scare with little Lola, every challenge with clients, as a positive. As opportunities to learn on this path chosen by me. It doesn’t make the difficult experiences any less difficult, but it makes them valuable. Worth going through. Because at the end of the day, if we cannot look for the positive in every situation that presents itself to us, good or bad, then we end up living our lives on edge and unfulfilled. We are always looking for an easy path which, frankly, doesn’t exist. It’s tough the whole way. But it’s because of the struggle, the challenge, that life becomes meaningful. And this is what makes every experience, good or bad, worth it. That is how I stay so positive.
Big hugs and so much love,